May 23

We began today with a writing into the day responding to the readings we read for homework (see slide 22 on the PowerPoint.)

Then, we discussed the writing into the day as a whole class.

• Revision is brainstorming, checking your work, editing.
• Revision is good because you might write unnecessary stuff first.  Keep going over and over it until you can fix it.
• As a writer, sometimes you think your writing is horrible and don't want anyone to see it.
• The most important part is at the end (the revision).
• The best draft you can get gets better as you revise.

In small groups, we discussed the questions on slide 24 of the PowerPoint.  In whole group, we said:

• Revision in the past was just been reading over it, using spell check and handing it in.  Revision was basically nonexistent.
• Revision was turning it in, getting red marks and changing what the teacher said it change.
• Focusing on the central idea wasn't something I did.
• When I write a long paper, I don't want to look at it anymore so I don't want to revise.
• Teachers expect us to already know what revision is.
• They have marked run ons, fragments, punctuation.
• Students are also defining revision at the sentence level.
• After you write your paper, you should read it aloud.
• They define revision at the sentence level because that's the way the school system says to define it.
• You have to learn the basics before you can go beyond it.
• What counts as "basics" depends on the person.

We talked about which sentence each person considers to be the better sentence:

1. Startling a starving husband makes for hot, jumping flies.
2. I believes he will, be good mayor.

We discussed the definition of revision with the handout on Moodle.  We also completed the Revision Activity as a whole group.  We determined that the first example is not thoughtful revision if only a few words are changed and only one sentence is deleted.  The second example could be thoughtful revision if the writer was considering reorganization throughout the paper (instead of just moving one sentence in the whole paper).  The third example is thoughtful revision.

Homework:

• Post a daybook reflection on your blog before 10:30 PM on Monday.
• Read "7 Ways High School Prepares You for Failure." 

No class on Monday.